A Narrow Line

I’m burning with creativity right now. I want to make everything.

I’m in a place where I’m needing to learn a whole bunch of different things in disparate areas to keep on top of where I want to be. Software, design, music, anatomy. It feels like school in some sense, but without teachers or exams. I have to study and practice, and be patient while the brain works its magic, allowing it to integrate. The curriculum feels (and is) infinitely broad and long, so it’s important to plant flags to keep my bearings, lest I get lost.

Where does she think they think she’s going in case they didn’t know?

— Robert Ashley, “Perfect Lives”

Life has been whirring by so quickly this year, it’s hard to catch my breath, or even to remember that I need to catch my breath. The scent of the sandalwood incense on the altar is doing wonders right now in bringing me back to here, so I can take stock and appreciate the unfathomable richness around me.

You that come to birth and bring the mysteries,
your voice-thunder makes us very happy.

Roar, lion of the heart
and tear me open.

— Rumi

Am I in a boat? If so, do I have a paddle or am I just being gently tossed down the river? All I know for sure is that I’m not standing on the shore. The viscous wetness of life permeates, a mix of joy and terror and absolute rightness.

All the modern things
Like cars and such
Have always existed
They’ve just been waiting in a mountain
For the right moment

— Björk, “The Modern Things”

While it’s been quiet with regards to web-presence, it’s been an eventful few months. I’m just emerging from a four-day software emergency, and feel like a bear coming out of hibernation. As I shake the sleep from my eyes, I realize how amazing the world is, and how grateful I am to have a place in it.

There are some moments where I can feel the interconnectedness of things, almost like a web of energy. It’s a humbling thing.